The Mute and the Liar Page 8

  He is painting me.

  It must be me. That's my face, right there, staring back at me with my own eyes. But he has drawn me... Differently. There is a crimson tint in my curly hair, a slight rosiness to my cheeks, and a few dotted freckles jumping across my nose. That's not how I look. Is it?

  Where is my pointy nose, or the small crease in my forehead? I am supposed to be plain and boring. Invisible. But this girl on the wall is beautiful. There's a slight glint in her chestnut eyes, as if she knows a huge secret, but she won't tell anyone, because secrets are just a game to her. As if she herself is an enigma. It's some sort of alternate version of me, perhaps what I would look like in a perfect world.

  Perhaps this is what I look like through his eyes. There's just one thing about the painting.

  He hasn't drawn my mouth.

  There is just a gaping blank space where my mouth should be. He doesn't seem to be interested in painting it. He is just adding a strand of gold to a ringlet, with the relaxed air of someone who has just finished working and doesn't plan on starting again any time soon.

  He looks up at my arrival and stands aside to allow me to see it clearly.

  Hesitating a little, I walk over and slowly reach out for the space. I only touch it with my fingertips, as though afraid it will cause the wall to crack.

  “Oh. That.” He says, watching the blank space too. “It's because I don't know what you look like when you smile. And I don't want to paint you sad.”

  A ripple seems to spread through me.

  It's a strange thing to say.

  I am his hostage. Why would he say something like that?

  Smiling. I haven't smiled properly for a long time. Fake smiles, sure, I do those all the time. But not real ones. I haven't thought about that, about how I don't smile. It's just the way I am. I wear my scowl like a crown. Like a sign of strength. I am perfectly fine living in this shell, watching the world at a distance.

  But Jayce wants me to smile.

  It's a strange thought, a thought that sends a lightless, balloon-like feeling in my stomach and a blanket-like warmth in my chest. I watch him carefully, feeling light-headed all of a sudden and dizzy, like my mind has slipped into cotton wool. Gently, I feel it creeping across my mouth. It's a warm, tingling sensation that I can feel slowly lighting up my whole face. It is not forced and it is not fake.

  For the first time in years, I am smiling.

  Chapter Eleven

  2nd March 2011

  8:35 AM

  There was a dress waiting for me on the vanity table this morning - a cream boatneck dress with a red floral pattern decorating it. I was a little worried about wearing it; I have only worn a couple of dresses in the past. Although, I have to admit, I like this one. I tie my hair into two low ponytails.

  Now the four of us are sitting around Kit’s dining table listening to her wonder out loud what we should do today. Jayce has washed his hair this morning, so it’s dripping wet and he has a towel wrapped around another ‘eco’ t-shirt (with the slogan ‘forget flower power. It’s all about solar power!’) It’s weird to see his hair all floppy and shielding his eyes; it’s such a change from the electrocuted fashion he has always had it in. His hair is quite long and appears golden now the gel has been replaced with water and it is catching light from the window.

  On the other side of the table, Kit seems to have decided to wear the nearest swan.

  I am finishing my cereal, Nick is jugging down coffee as though it is water and he is standing in a desert, and Jayce is attempting to stab a piece of toast to death.

  “How about we go to the city centre? We could show Alicia around?” Kit offers.

  The city centre? That’s brilliant! I straighten up, looking directly at her. I can feel my pulse quickening and a fluttering in my stomach. If I could go outside, I could try to escape!

  Jayce stops stabbing the toast (which now looks more like a pile of miserable breadcrumbs) and worriedly turns to me. He watches me for a few seconds, perhaps wondering whether he could risk taking me outside. Eventually he looks away and shakes his head slightly, deciding against it.

  “That’s not such a good idea.”

  “Oh come on. It will be fun! You used to live here; you could show her everything! You know all the best places to go and sights to see!”

  “Well, I think it would be fun,” Nick pipes in.

  We all look at Jayce with big, pleading eyes. He glares for a few moments, but finally sighs and gives in.

  “Fine. But we can’t let Alicia out of our sight, okay? We wouldn’t want her to… Get hurt. Or something,” with this vague and totally not-suspicious statement, he slithers from the room, only to be chased by Nick.

  I cannot believe it! I can go outside! Excitement sweeps over me, and hope feels like a dragonfly: it dances, hovers and buzzes right in front of me, just in reach. I should start planning all the ways I can escape or get help. I will definitely run to get help the second I can get away from them, and I might even give this notebook to the police.

  Nick and Jayce have been outside for a while now. I wonder what they're talking about. In fact, I'll just go and find out for myself.

  They are whispering in the corridor, and are so engrossed in their discussion they do not acknowledge me when I arrive.

  “You could get caught; she could escape. It’s not worth it.”

  “You’re the one who said it would be fun! Anyway, I think it will be fine.

  I’ll just keep her close. We’ll be in disguise anyway. No one will notice us.” We both look at him blankly.

  “You know. Disguise. It’s that thing where you dress mysteriously to be incognito. Wow, that’s a cool word. Incognito. Anyway, look,” he walks up to the coat rack by the door and swings a green shapeless trench coat over his shoulders. “Dashing, yes, I know. I am quite the dapper chap. And for you…”

  He walks over to the coat rack again, picks a red beret and slams it over my head.

  “Where did Alicia go?” he spins around, pretending to look for me, as though the beret has somehow made me invisible. He doesn’t seem to realise it is bright red; I won’t be ‘incognito.’ I’ll stand out like a pimple!

  Well, I’m not going to complain anyway. It will help me get attention. I can finally go outside! I have a chance to escape!

  *****

  11:34 AM

  Bath is beautiful. Everywhere I look there are beautiful buildings and vibrant people. Foreign languages flutter through the air, people without outrageous clothing parade the streets, and as well as that there are also some people wearing Jane Austen era clothing because of the Jane Austen museum nearby. You can’t take one step without bumping into someone. We passed the Royal Crescent, which took my breath away. Buskers decorate every corner, all of them setting free beautiful music, melding together to ignite the whole city. So far I have even seen an opera singer, (whom Kit loudly announced she was ten times better than) and a Spaniard strumming a banjo in a tune that could have been background music to Speedy Gonzales.

  It’s a good day to visit the city too. The day has been blessed with the sort of weather where the light fractures through the paper creases of the rainy sky, so it's half-rain and half-shine and all the children crane their heads to look for rainbows.

  We have just left the Victoria Art Gallery. It wasn't for me. As I said before, I see the logic in the world, not the colours of it. I wish I could look at art and appreciate it and understand it. But to me, every painting looked the same and some of them just looked like a few colourful-but-ugly splatters on a canvas - something a kid could do in a few minutes.

  There doesn't seem much point i n art. With maths you can actually learn more about the world. You can understand concepts our lives balance on. It has meaning. For me, art is just mess.

  Nick didn’t like the art gallery much either, clearly getting bored in the first half hour. Jayce dragged his feet along, barely saying anything. It was only Kit who seemed interested, jumping around th
e place as though she were a lost beggar who had ended up in a bank vault.

  Kit was discussing something with Nick just now, but now she has turned around to talk to us.

  “Nicky and I are going to get some more paint and other items so I can continue redecorating. We might also pop to Asda. Jaycie, you can show her around, and we will meet up again here at about five. Okay?”

  I almost forget to breathe. They are going to leave us?

  Don’t leave me with Jayce! Not only is that pretty much horrible news, it also means I can’t escape if it is just the two of us. He will notice straight away if I try to run. I was hoping I could make a run for it if he got distracted with something, but it seems it will be impossible to slip away unnoticed now.

  They quickly discuss what they’re going to do now. I am so stunned I cannot do anything to stop them. Kit hands me a black umbrella, warning me it will rain heavily very soon. Before I have a chance to even register what is happening, they have already left. Jayce gives me a weak smile, as if not so thrilled with the news either.

  “Let’s go then. I’ll show you around. Bath is a pretty place.”

  Jayce walks a little ahead of me singing a song I haven’t heard before under his breath and I tag along behind him. He seems a little… Distanced. Acting differently. Maybe it’s the weak smiles and the slight slouch in his shoulders, or the strange, shapeless trench coat he is wearing which is so different to his normal t-shirts and jeans, or his hair which looks much floppier and blonder today.

  We walk on for a little, when suddenly he grasps my shoulders and drags me behind a bush and forces me to kneel down.

  “Shhh!” he whispers, pressing a finger over his lips.

  Through the spaces in the leaves I see three policemen push their way past the crowds and then charge along the path leading out of the street.

  “Okay. All clear.” Jayce drags me up again and continues marching ahead of me.

  That all seemed a little extreme just to avoid some policemen. Is he really that worried about getting caught? He seemed so fearless and reckless before, emanating the aura of someone who couldn’t care less what sort of danger they got into as long as they had fun doing it. I did not expect him to worry this much.

  A few drops of rain leave inky studs on the pavement around me. I put up Kit’s umbrella, and soon enough the rain starts crashing in. Jayce puts the collar of his trench coat up, and seems a little irritated. Heh. Probably scared the rain is going to mess up his hair on the one day he combed it.

  Actually, I feel a little sorry for him. He seems so small shrouded in that coat and with the rain rushing down his cheeks and seeping into his hair, leaving it nothing more than yellow rat’s tails. And he did wash his hair this morning. What if he catches a cold? Sure, I don’t like him, but colds are nasty.

  Fine. I am going to do the right thing here.

  I catch up to him and lift the umbrella over his head, so it shields us both. He stops walking and looks at me, his expression something between surprise and curiosity. Around us people continue dashing everywhere and pushing past, and I feel as if we’re the only people standing still. We stand like that for a while, just falling into each other’s eyes with the rain falling around us.

  “Thanks,” he says softly.

  Huddled under the umbrella, we carry on walking and soon reach some sort of a square filled with shops and tourists. The Bath Abbey towers up ahead.

  “So this is the Abbey,” Jayce introduces the beautiful cathedral we are standing in front of with the ladder of stone angels clambering up to the top on the west front and one huge arched window stretching over the front building above the arched front door. Spires and pinnacles twist up towards the sky and stained glass windows line every wall.

  I close the umbrella, we enter and Jayce pays a donation. I am astounded. There are four rows of pews all leading up to an alter and one huge long thin stained glass window on the farthest wall, which is encased between two smaller stained glass windows. There is a fan-vaulted ceiling, which makes it look as though the ceiling has been crotched. Little shields stud the ceiling occasionally. Red chandeliers hang in a line above the pews and there are flowerpots and stands of candles everywhere.

  Jayce is looking at me shyly, possibly waiting for my opinion, and I smile.

  We sit in one row of the pews, and after a few minutes of silence, a blonde teenager showing off a tailcoat suit appears and talks to a loitering priest nearby.

  “No one has paid for the tour today I’m supposed to do at eleven. Can I come back in an hour or so?” the blonde boy has a very cut-glass voice, which I haven't really heard before. They talk a little more, and seem to come to an agreement. The boy turns to walk away.

  “Former choirboy,” Jayce explains. “They always get them to do the tours. You know, the slavery job no one else wants to do.”

  Unfortunately, it seems the boy overhead that and turns to stare at us as he walks past. His dark blue, heavily lidded eyes widen a little when he sees me and he stops walking. He gives me a crooked smile, and I can feel myself blushing. I swear I always do when a stranger looks at me, but now it’s even worse that he is smiling at me. Jayce, who has seen this encounter, looks irritably from the boy to me and back to the boy again. He suddenly slumps back and crosses his arms.

  “Can we help you?” he spits. The boy shuffles, and light pink taints his dimpled cheeks. Jayce turns to me.

  “So you like posh boys? Well, did you know I was a choirboy here too? Did all the singing and stuff.”

  “I don’t remember you,” the boy mumbles. Startled a little, Jayce looks up at him, probably not expecting the boy to talk to him.

  “I wasn't talking to you,” Jayce snaps. “Go back to whatever posh boys do. Go back to drinking tea and watching horse races.”

  “That’s not very nice,” he mutters indignantly, crossing his arms and sticking his nose in the air. He is probably the same age as Jayce and his posh voice makes him sound older, but with the way he acts you’d think he was a toddler.

  “I’ve never been 'nice.' Now would you care to stop ogling my girl?” That breaks the boy’s ‘too cool’ façade, and he looks down again, his cheeks burning even more. And did he just call me ‘His girl?’ What is Jayce playing at? I glare at him, but he just grins at me.

  “Sorry. She’s… She’s very pretty,” the boy says sweetly, but I am too shocked at what Jayce just said to register it.

  “What’s your name, kid? Let me guess, Jeremiah? Jonathon? Jerome?” “Jeffrey.”

  “I swear that was one of the options.”

  “And don’t call me a kid. I’m probably older than you,” Jeffrey ponders over something for a few seconds, and then shrugs his shoulders, seemingly coming to a conclusion about something. “Anyway, I’m bored, so do you want a free tour?”

  “Why would I want a tour of a place I have been in a million times?”

  “I wasn’t asking you. I was asking the lady. Do you want a free tour?” he turns to me with a softness in his eyes. I nod just to annoy Jayce and feel a glimmer of triumph when Jayce rolls his eyes and slumps back in his chair. Jeffrey grins, stretches out his arms and loudly addresses all the pews, as though speaking to hundreds of people, even though it’s just the two of us.

  “Welcome to the Abbey! I’m Jeffrey and I will be your tour guide for this morning. We are going to climb a lot of stairs today, so be prepared!”

  *****

  2:00 PM

  I learnt so much, like how since 757 AD three different churches have occupied the site of the Abbey, those being an Anglo-Saxon Abbey Church in 757 but pulled down in 1066, a Norman cathedral begun being built around 1090 and the present Abbey Church which was founded in 1499, but was only completed in 1611. I also learnt it has a lot of stairs.

  When we finished the tour, I invited Jeffrey to come explore Bath with us. I thought I would feel safer around Jayce if he was with us too. Jayce wasn't too impressed, but Jeffrey said yes. So that's what we did.
First we visited the Roman Baths, which were beautiful, but also a little daunting. They were quite small and the water was green and from where we were standing reflected nothing, like instead of reflecting the world, it was consuming the world into its murky depths instead. Then we just wandered around the town centre. Jayce chased loads of pigeons in this big square area where there were hundreds of them. It looked fun so Jeffrey and I joined in and soon we ended up chasing each other.

  We all got ice creams after that. I picked strawberry one. Although I don't usually eat foods other than cereal pasta and some fruits and vegetables, I can't resist an ice cream! Jayce ended up getting his ice cream on his nose, which I found really funny. Then we went to a shop selling sunglasses and tried on the most ridiculous pairs of sunglasses we could find. I chose a bright pink pair with huge butterfly-like lenses.

  I didn't feel like I was a hostage. I felt like I was with a friend. I even stopped feeling scared at one point, just forgot about everything. Is that really bad?

  I know I should still feel scared of Jayce. I do. But it's so easy to forget that when he acts like this. When he acts like a friend. I had to remind myself at least twice that he's not, that he is a dangerous person and I need to be on my guard at all times and thinking of a way to escape.

  I did consider escaping and I kept trying to think of ways I could do that. But there wasn't an opportunity for me to do that - Jayce kept close beside me at all times. I think I will have to wait until we go back to Nick and Kit.

  Jeffrey had to go back to the Abbey after that to do another tour. I felt a little sad when he left - I would rather he stayed with me. Now that it's back to just Jayce and I, I'm starting to feel like a hostage all over again.

  Now Jayce and I are back in the crowded centre. He is a little ahead of me.

  “Hey there! Watch where you’re going!” Someone has just slammed into Jayce.

  I look up to see a gangly boy with his raven hair in some sort of Mohawk hairstyle. There is a scar running underneath his dark brown eyes and he’s got more metal chains wrapped around him than Houdini.